


Diminuendo

by MisterEAnon



Category: Zootopia (2016)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Gen, Roleswap AU, Smoking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-22
Updated: 2017-01-22
Packaged: 2018-09-19 06:20:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,091
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9422279
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MisterEAnon/pseuds/MisterEAnon
Summary: An AU where Nick hits it big as a music star, and Gazelle becomes the dejected dropout with no ambition. But when a chance falls into her lap unexpectedly to turn her life around, she finds it's not a decision she's up to making by herself.





	

Mikey had a sick sense of humor.

 

I scowled, angrily puffing at my cigarette, staring at the embossed slips of paper in my hoof. Two backstage passes to one of the biggest concerts of the year.

 

A concert with my ex-boyfriend, Nick Wilde.

 

I stuffed the tickets into the inner pocket of my jacket- I didn't want to look at them. It's been over ten years since I left him, but that jackass ram decided it was still worth taunting me over.

 

He'd see how much he liked his little prank when I cut him out of the next few jobs I ran.

 

At least it was quiet, here. I hadn't really been feeling the bar scene tonight. I leaned over the diner's counter, rubbing at my eyes carefully with my hooves. I was used to the awkwardness involved.

 

I didn't really know what to think. Yeah, Mikey's a douche, but I shouldn't be so easy to rile up, either. Even after a decade later, old wounds still hadn't healed.

 

I knew better, now. I knew he just wanted to support me when I made my big break. I knew that he was just passing the time, trying out one of the other sound-booths while I had my audition.

 

And I knew he didn't know that they were only interested in hiring one mammal, and that he was stealing my dream away from me when they picked him over me. Hindsight made everything clearer, but it didn't make anything hurt less.

 

Nick had always been resigned to the fact that he was a fox, and therefore wouldn't be able to go legitimate. It made him such a bad-boy in high school, with a heart of gold. It was no wonder I fell for him, really. He saw it as a chance to be seen as something other than an untrustworthy hustler. He was so happy.

 

I fucked up. I pulled away from him, we stopped talking, and we drifted apart, all because I was being a stupid, bitter teenager who couldn't pull her head from her ass long enough to set things straight with him. And now, here I was- Smoking in an abandoned diner, instead of out running jobs with the rest of the gang.

 

Fuck, I felt pathetic. I didn't usually swear this much, even to myself. Hell, I didn't swear at all out loud. The boys had been a bad influence on me, I could tell.

 

I tapped the ash off my spend smoke into an ashtray on the counter-top, idly reaching into my jacket pocket for one of my loose ones. That just made my hoof brush against the tickets, and I glowered even harder at nothing in particular.

 

A little fumbling with a hoof-friendly lighter later, and I was back to contemplating. I didn't know what to think about the tickets. For the longest time, I had stood by my stupid, emotional decision. It had been too long, and I doubted Nick even knew my name anymore, up there with the stars.

 

I had thought I was okay with that- That I was okay with keeping the radio off and letting the past lie, pretending it didn't mean anything to me.

 

The chance to meet up with him again in person was a hell of a temptation, though. And after I'd given up on my dreams, I hadn't seen a lot of point in resisting.

 

Fuck it. I couldn't really make a decision on this myself, and I didn't have to. There was a reason I was at this diner- The gang owned it, and it was a point of pride for the boss. I didn't really get the appeal of the retro aesthetic, but I could tell it was done well.

 

I took a long drag from my cigarette one last time before standing up, letting it dangle from my hoof. It was probably time to see The Boss.

 

He was in the managers office, of course. He insisted on making this the most official kind of 'headquarters' we had, and it had worked out so far. It wasn't where all the business went down, but it's where he spent his free time, and it showed.

 

Plenty of the lower-tier members of the herd were nervous to confront the boss, and I figured his massive fangs probably factored into that. I pushed open his door without fear, waving my smoke at him in greeting. “Hey, Apollo.”

 

The musk-deer behind the manager's desk looked up at me, a hard frown melting into a welcoming smile right away as he saw who it was. “Ayy, it's my little Gazelle. Didn't your parents ever teach you to knock?” he playfully chastised, closing the laptop in front of him and slipping it under the desk.

 

“I haven't had manners since I joined you rabble,” I replied, hoofing my way over and taking one of the two open seats in front of him. “Hey, so… I got a question for you.”

 

The fanged prey in front of me just shook his head. “Nah, don't worry- Mikey's already been chewed out for it. Picking at someone's past like that… Definitely a no-no,” he informed me. “Most of us don't exactly have pasts we're proud of. Guy shoulda' known better.”

 

“Well, that's why he's barely a grunt, but that's not… Exactly… what I wanted to talk about,” I clarified, leaving trails of smoke through the air as I gestured with my vice of choice. “I've got a big decision to make, here, and I'm not sure of anything anymore.”

 

Apollo chuckled. “Please- You're practically family, chica. You know you can come to me with anything,” he reminded me.

 

I glanced down to a particular item on his desk - a framed picture of him with his little brother, wearing matching shirts, with ‘hard boy’ written on his and ‘soft boy’ on his sibling’s. I chuckled, shaking my head a little. Family was important to us, and I think that made me feel a little better coming to him with this.

 

After a moment, I looked back up to him. “Yeah. But I don't know if I'd be returning to you guys after this,” I admitted, not entirely happy about saying it out loud.

 

He hummed. “You should probably tell me what it **is** before I can give you any advice. And you know I'd miss you, you know? You're one of the best we have, in our little 'family'.”

 

I was aware of that. The praise didn't exactly make me feel any better. “So, Mikey got me these tickets, right? Normally, I'd just tell him to go f- Screw himself.” I paused to gather my thoughts.

 

“Right. That part's taken care of.”

 

“Yeah. But the thing is, these aren't regular tickets. These are backstage tickets- As in, I'd actually get a chance to talk to Nick backstage, face to face. Personally. I…”

 

I sighed, raising my ignored cigarette and flicking it into Apollo's ashtray. He didn't smoke, and he insisted that nobody else did while they were talking to him.

 

“I dunno. I was acting like a stupid teenager when I left him, and I've stood by my stupid decision because I was too scared to face the consequences, instead of running away from them. Maybe I could make up with him. Maybe I could… Try to join up with him, somehow.”

 

I scowled, staring down at the desk in front of me. Thinking about how Nick had stolen the spot- Stolen my dream away from under my feet with his raw charisma.. It still made me mad. But these days, it just made me mad at myself for never _explaining_ it to him. I knew now that Nick was a good guy. He'd have given the job up in a heartbeat if I'd just told him.

 

“I've thought for years now it's too late to go back. Now that I have an excuse, I'm wondering if it really is, or if I'm just a coward.”

 

I didn't know what life would have been like if I'd landed the job. I could have made a name for myself, gotten power, fame and wealth. I could have done things with my life, made a change for the better…

 

I'm pretty sure that version of me wouldn't be smoking and brooding in a 1950's-style diner owned by a gang leader, though. That much, I was pretty clear on.

 

I glanced up at my boss- And my friend. “Got any advice, chief?”

 

He nodded. “Yeah. A lot of people would give many, many things to fix the mistakes of their past, chica. If being brave is what you've got to do, then you've got to do it. I think you should talk to him. Things could really turn around for you, having someone that famous on your side. And if not--”

 

To my surprise, he stood up, shuffling around the desk and wrapping an arm around my shoulder in a light hug. “--Then you'll always have us to come back to. We'll support you no matter what you do, you know that. As long as it's good for you, anyway.”

 

I smiled. There really was nothing quite like a herd for support. My gang wasn't quite a 'family' like, say, the operation running down in Tundra (Partially because nothing we did was _technically_ illegal) but I'd say that was a difference for all the better. “Thanks, Apollo. You always know best,” I murmured as I returned the hug.

 

He grinned at me with those intimating fangs of his. “That's why I'm in charge,” he joked. “Now get out of my office- You have things to do. And hey… Even if he's too busy to start dating you again, you might just snag a _Amigovio_ , ah?”

 

I blushed. “Shut up,” I retorted, pulling away. “It's been too long for that.”

 

The musk-deer just shook his head, chuckling. “You may be _hija_ to me, but I can see you are _deslumbrante_. If you want him, I have no doubt you can charm him back, chica.”

 

“Your Spanish is godawful,” I laughed. “You're lucky I like you, boss. I hope I don't _have_ to come back… But I hope I get the chance to, anyway.”

 

“You'll be welcome here if you're still one of us or not. Now go, before I offend you further with terrible spanish,” he teased.

 

I just shook my head, turning my back as I stepped towards the door. “I'm going, I'm going.”

 

Maybe it wouldn't be so bad, after all.

 

( * * * )

 

This was one of the worst ideas I'd had in a while.

 

I don't know how I could think this would be easy. I'd gotten backstage easily enough just as soon as I'd flashed my tickets to the burly wolves on staff, but that wasn't the problem.

 

The problem was the _waiting._ I leaned back against the wall, cigarette in hand. Fortunately, they hadn't frisked me and taken my lighter. If they would even find it inside my jacket, anyway.

 

I had _no idea_ what I was going to say to him, now that I was actually here. I could still barely believe that I'd had the nerve to be here in the first place.

 

And the singing… Nick was a beautiful singer, once he opened up a little. I'd encouraged him, in the beginning- He got all flustered about it, at first. I'd thought it was cute, when we were teens. I'd been trying to avoid my feelings on his music ever since.

 

I glanced at one of the screens streaming a feed from the stage, looking at the massive crowd of excited mammals. He wasn't shy about it anymore, that much was obvious.

 

Being back here, though, around all this equipment, it reminded me of my dream. What would have been my future, if I'd just been a little braver. And a very special song I'd been working on for a long time now, even without hope for releasing it.

 

And then he was there- Strolling backstage, fiddling with his tie and that ridiculous shirt he loved. Not even being a superstar would get him to dress anything other than business casual.

 

I waved idly with a hoof, blowing a ring of smoke in his direction. “Hey… Hey, Nick.”

 

The motion caught his eye before I had even started speaking, and he was staring at me with undisguised surprise. “Gazelle?”

 

I took a deep breath. I could do this. I had to, for myself if nothing else.

 

I mean... Try everything, right?

**Author's Note:**

> A Diminuendo is the opposite of a crescendo, if you were wondering.
> 
> Please leave a comment!


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